The marks left sting, a lot. The noises are getting too incoheerent,
or perhaps I have lost the sense of reality around me.
Instead of rotting my time with Chem,
I'm posting here, oh the irony.
I went again, somehow I feel weird every single time.
I wanted to belong so badly. But every single time.
I would stick out. Someone once asked,
why you suddenly turn so quiet and guai
when they came.
It's because that's when i put on a front.
The layers I conceal; too hard to bear
to take off everything to just break down.
It's not that I'm faking, but i just can't let
loose in front of people. It's getting hard
to be myself anymore.
I don't need help; I don't need a listening ear either.
Because trust has just been as elusive.
And words are better left unsaid,
as the thoughts run free,
Silently killing whatever hope I have left.
Deprived and yearning for care and concern.
Yet pushing everything away.
Sometimes I think I'm just too drama
and contradictory for my own good,
Instead of pondering over life's issues,
I should go back to equations and symbols.
They seem by far less intimidating and unknown.
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