Review

I wonder how i managed to post every single day last year -_____-

Since i won't be here when new year is here, So and early post on new year resolution

and how life has been this year.

You know i was planning to have a nice post about how it has been

but i just receive shocking news... so i will post later on

when my mood is not on a killing spree. :D

Rejection

I usually don't post twice on the same day anymore.

technically i count today still as 15/12 considering i still haven't sleep.

I just got the sermon cd from char this afternoon and listened to it

it really impacted me a lot, God really spoke to me, i mean it's not that

He don't speak to me, this one just stood out even more, maybe cause I was

rather trapped in the issue of rejection.

Hahahah, quite a few of them held me in mind when they were listening to this

really thank them a lot

the sermon was powerful.
really felt like a whole burden is released from my chest

is that one feel like Lord, when they are free?

Let the flashback starts and let us never suppress it.

Embracing it and we'll be free

Epic day ever

I think i'm really such a klutz..

But today was seriously the best!!!! ^^ SUPER AWESOME.

met lovinlife first.. hahha she was working at bakerzin..

I think the supervisors there must have thought

i'm some kindda weirdo, always loitering..

but because mel was late or i was too early = =

but i had to run an errand BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

Actually it was rather ok-ok before the whole movie thing

I bought them flower (: Pink rose for lovinlife

she was wearing pink hence the colour.

Mel... i got her a red daisy (: Daisy being her fav..

uhhh red looks the nicest.

Lunch was actually just mostly walking here and there

trying to find a place to eat... Hahaha, but i'm like

the total opposite of Grandma ( AND YES, SHE ACKNOWLEDGED ME ALREADY!!
ANOTHER THING TO BE HAPPY ABOUT)

cause she like veggies and all,

and basically veggies just turn me off...

So met uncle at the cinema,

and guess what.. I really think I made history

with the dumb stuff i did...

Cause mel entrusted the tickets to me

and..... being me, I lost them...

yes, I'm such a clutz.

But running here and there,

mel asking lovinlife to check the flower..

(i have no idea why..)

THANK GOD I FOUND THEM.

it was in the place where we eat..

must have dropped when i was showing mel

the badges..

can you imagine it?! It's like super crowded and everything

and not one person actually pick up the tickets,

and it's like even my chair where i was sitting has been moved

NO ONE TOUCHED IT.

And also, the thought that i might dropped it in the food court

hit me. REALLY THANK GOD ON THAT.

IT'S LIKE WOW. AMEN.
It's like such a BIG sign that He really want me to watch this movie!

And well, basically even when i was finding the tickets,

i was being myself again. such a clutz -.-

almost fell off the escaltor

I didn't realised Narnia was written by a Christian author

and that Aslan was actually talking about Jesus!

I had always LOVE the LION without realizing that.

Some quotes which i REALLY LOVE.

“I am,” said Aslan. “But there I have another name. You must learn to know me by that name. This was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there.”

Aslan: Things never happen the same way twice, dear one.

Peter Pevensie: Lucky you know.

Lucy Pevensie: What do you mean?

Peter Pevensie: You've seen him. I wish he'd just given me some sort of proof.

Lucy Pevensie: Maybe we're the ones that need to prove ourselves to him.

Really teared... mel and gab were making fun of me for that = =

then we just walked around i guess before settling down to eat ice cream..

We all shared what we love about the movie.

Mel was like scolding gab for making her miss that important line

Teehee. I didn't miss it though Really powerful words.

Mel and I fav one has to be the one where Lucy was tempted to sin.

Throughout the whole movie, it has all just been about temptation.

The Devil trying to tempt us to do sins, but unlike real life,

we do not have green smoke to show that.

Sigh, i was looking through the web for the quotes for that particular part

couldn't find it at all. ):

Okay, according to how i remember it, Lucy has forsaken herself for beauty

And there are just something only one can do that others could not,

and it's really something that has impacted me, to listen to what

God really want me to do and not stray from that path and listen to what

others' want me to.

HAHAHHA,then we started talking about pokemon for some reason.

I think over the scenes we cried over.

Bye bye Butterfree!! Mel and I high fived for this

Pikachu leaving Ash. Pikachu wishing not to evolve. Mew and Mewtwo fight where Ash turned into stone.

LOVE. I always thought i was emotional..

can cry over drama.. Mel watched Fated to love you too!!!

Then we had discipleship! Of how we must continue to stick close to one another

as a community and grow spiritually closer to God. Really powerful messages

Then joyce came.. Mel and her chatted for awhile..

and i was like thinking to myself.. teacher to teacher-in-training..

Then i went off with joyce... hahha, i feel really high and crazy with her.

keep calling her my mama. Then she was like saying how i'm like

acting yadar yadar in front of lifegroup because i was like so si wen.

HAHAHA.

Also because i was like telling mel i'm like the craziest one among my friends.

Cat agree with me!!

Then she was giving me this disbelieving look. HAHHAHA

Super high seh today.
i really love today a lot. GUESS WHAT

TMR I'M MEETING CHAR AND I'M GOING TO WATCH NARNIA AGAIN.

YAYYYYYYYYYYYY

A blast from past

I seriously need to look for a study partner = =

being stuck at home.. i have done nothing productive

except for trying to find my holiday hw and attempting

mcq for chinese. Distracting too.. i have apparently

watched a movie "the clash of the titans"

and went to clear my first drawer and second drawer.

found heaps of treasures too while i was clearing.

super high over clearing the first drawer,

i think it's just caused i have no idea how on earth

those stuff got there in the first place

second drawer.. is more like going deep down,

and all the stuff i thought i had forgotten or had tried

hard to push it down

But y'know something, i wasn't sad at all when i was looking through

all the stuff ( yes i keep a lot of stuff some of which ppl might call rubbish)

i was actually smiling through them... at the letters.

heaps of them, from classmates, seniors, choir mates...

cards, christmas, birthday.. i even found some of pri sch one :D

just a tinge of longing to never grow up.. Haha, i think i wrote that for

pril's poem.

i found a music note necklace~~ (: from ash..

ahhhhh somehow i felt so grateful for all the friends i have

loveeeee.

these few days, it wasn't inspiration that hit me

it was the fact that i had to vent it off

if not i will start shouting at people again. bad habit tsk tsk.

I never regret any friends I made. they are the best part of who I am.

I couldn't sleep much yesterday,

thoughts just clouded my head.

still very much sick, hahah will be killed by pril.

I miss school.. haha sounds weird but i do.
just not the hectic homework rush please.

am determined to finish my math and chi

by tue... given the time, i should be able to,

just whether i'm motivated enough is another question..

Super excited over meeting lovinlife on wed!!!
HAHAHHA Super funny if i ever see her serve food.

meeting char too!! so it will be like meeting quite a few

of the lifegroup people yay~~~

But i miss cat the most though

such a long long time.

Doesn't mean i don't say it, i don't feel it.

Doesn't mean i don't show it, i don't feel it.

But I'm easy to read like an abc book

I'm like a glass transparent

and very much fragile.

But unlike a glass

i have many

layers

that

i

don't wish to see myself

I'm lactose intolerant wow...

LMLD man..

this week has just been sick. sick and more sick.

Terrible.. = = had to bomb like 4 people because of it.

but still, went with Lp to study.. we studied for quite a long

time. so proud of myself. did like 10 chi compre?

today went out with joyce~~~
so happy, teehee.
Bombed her waller though, haha she treated me for like

quite a lot. ate mudpie ♥ LOVE LOVE
then found out i can't eat it anymore, since i can't take diary product ):
SADFACE.

uhhhh, then went to see nail polish for lpp and Lp
HAHAHA i didn't realise their name looks identical.

there wasn't the brand lpp wanted and the colour lp wanted was gone ):
Bought books for popular for the chi tuition coming up.. gah. D:
tsk tsk, then i realised i only had 2 bucks left.. = =

then went over to buy KOI~
Yay, finally tried it, really overrated lehh..

couldn't tell what's nice about it..

but overall, today was the bomb!!

♥love going out with joyce~~

kept making weird funny noises along the way..

i can still feel her goldfish eyes rolling away at me...

Christians are good but they are not good people.

Had been a long time since i seen them,
i just felt so happy and blessed to be there.
It's like I really felt like i came home somehow.
Sounds wrong, but that' what pril had asked,
or so i mistook her question..
It seems like we're going to split,
feel rather sad though..
But happy that 10 more are joining us.. HEE.
Embrace the change, i mean it's not as though
when i first stepped into lifegroup they were strangers too.
HAHAA but i remembered i was really touched,
and i had grown attached to them...

We have joy, we have fun, we have seasons in the sun.
We had build great sandcastles in the sky so high.

Ohhhhh so what i learned when i went church,
3 signs that you are not going anywhere in life or not the right path

1. A good person waiting for enthusiasm to strike
It was really applicable, especially in the current situation right now
where people just seemed to not be enthu and not care at all,
it was really depressing.. how they dreaded it,
i had fallen into it many times.
But yep, enthusiasm means action, and you can't just
wait for action to strike, and most often it's through
our influence that people get excited and want to do things.
Thus, everything all begin with us opening our mouth to
include, involve and create the mood.

2. A good person waiting for the "right time"
There isn't really a "right time", the issue that you're dealing
either end up being forgotten or one just doesn't have the courage
to go about doing it because it just "wasn't the right time".
People yearn for perfection, and often so, the fear of rejections
itself is imminent, which often lead to things being not done.

3. A person with best intentions but no strategies to get there.
This i had agreed the most, it's like with all the things now,
what often seems like the best intention always get mistaken
for something more sinister. It's like a present, wrapped beautifully
unless we go about opening it, there is no way of knowing what is inside.
But we are afraid of what is inside it.. kindda idea.
Doesn't really fit anyway, hahha.

Beside, yearning for perfection in the world's eyes is just an endless
journey, we're already made perfect in the Lord's eyes. We just have
to put our goals in front like a car, and our emotions, whatever issues
behind, and let them drive us there, instead of being tied down to
all the what if's and maybe's. Haha, and also like a car,
taking dubious shortcuts, I admitted that I do that sometimes too,
and that always caused me to do things more slowly and things just
get messy.
So i will live it all up to You,
Who's dancing, who's singing?
who's living a life worth living?
we are, we are, we are, we are shining light of salvation.


God has stooped down to make you great (:
- Mel wrote it for me, something that got me by

wow. I'm shocked I haven't updated in a long time.

The trees sighed in the wind,

endless memories pour forth of the times,

of the children that danced around it,

where had they all gone to.

Sighing at the wind,

the past is a place to visit but not to stay

the future is just another unknown

bound by the hopeful.

She's not worth the wait, all she ever was a mist

bound by mystery, always so close yet so far

A game of hide and seek,

yet it seemed shrouded with nothing more

that what it seems, yet it never appears that way.

Figment of memories turn rusty with age

Walking bowed in silence,

I see no more.

HAHAHA i came up with it like 10 mins ago.

I SCREAM CLOSURE.

sound like ice cream close here. hungry :/

Going to meet the lifegroup soon.

teeeheee. Happy~

"THE DEEP HOLE IS NOT MEANT FOR JUST ANYONE MY DEAR

EVEN THOUGH I HAVE FEELINGS FOR YOU, MY HEART YEARNS MUCH MORE FOR SOMEONE I CANNOT HAVE

CALL IT LOVE, CALL IT LUST, SHE IS THE ONLY ONE I NEED."

A startling confession.